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Chasing Delilah


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#1 Jcrazy

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 06:37 PM

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Summer.That one little word that means far too much to every kid from the moment they start school to the moment it ends. Chase Walker isn't determined to make this one any different than the past ones. He's been perfectly content with what he's done in past summers—pingpong and working at Coffee. Then one girl with a serious past, no license, and an impossible mission shows up. Just like that, Chase's summer sends him traveling down a new and crazy road.



Hey y'all! :) This is my new story that's been floating around in my head for the longest time. It means a lot to me and I hope you guys enjoy it! I'm really trying to improve, so any CC is extremely welcome. Please comment and tell me what you think of the summary. The first chapter is coming as soon as I get some reviews!

And, yes, this is being told from a guys perspective. Which is different, so if you have any suggestions on how to make a guy sound like a guy, let me know. Haha.

:) Jamie

Banner disclaimer:
Original artist: qwert10101
Image adapted by: Jcrazy (Jamie)
Original image: Road Trip
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#2 gagaga88

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 07:01 PM

I LOVE THIS IDEA
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#3 DayDreamer95

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 07:07 PM

Jamie? Well, what can I say? I mean I just have three words

I.LOVE.THIS.IDEA


Okay four, but who cares! The first line means a lot, it has to grab my attention. Which it did!

I love it!

So CHAPTER ONE coming up!

Alex~

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#4 papercut

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 07:36 PM

This sounds AWESOME!!!

love it already

mel :)
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#5 Ohliveeah

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 09:14 PM

This sounds really cool.
I cannot wait until you post the first chapter! :)

Ps, I adore your banner/cover thing. It is really awesome. ;D
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#6 <3Cheese<3

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 09:37 PM

Dear Child of Whom I Know,

You have informed me to make this "not really long if you want, l.o.l" but I am afraid to tell...TOO BAD! suuuccckkker!

Just kidding! But I do want to make this crazy and fun-tastic! 

Today is May 20, and as EVERYONE knows, today is national Eliza Doolittle day! Also it is the 140th day in the year. So aren't you a lucky lass?? (Eww there was a hair in meh mouth!) 

Jamie, your story sounds...like...a lot of running!! Haha Because, Chase? Walker? Yeah...I'm good *smirks*  

I can't wait to read the fourth chapter! Yeah that's right, I've already read the first three! BAM YO IN YO FACES YOU LITTLE CHILDREN ON THE INTER WEB! 

So in conclusion, I would really appreciate it if you hired me for this job because I'm crazy, spazzy, ADORABLE!, and absolutely no one could every replace me! 

Update When Your Fingers Can Type!

<3 Cheese Gal 

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#7 papercut

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 09:53 PM

hahaha you say it's the 20th of May the 140th day of the year

but it's the 21st here

and i would know that


because today as my family keep reminding me

is my birthday

cue sarcstic screams of joy


why do i hate my birthday


why because at the moment i am spending my time doing my assignment . . .


on sti's


yay!!!


enjoy the 20th while you can!


mel :)
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#8 Dramagirl221

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 09:59 PM

Well well well. She strikes again. :icon_geek:

Sounds cool. You should seriously consider updating, like, right this second would be very nice. :mgbumblebee:
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#9 IlovePavlov13

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Posted 20 May 2011 - 10:27 PM

Dude.

THIS.

JUST THIS.

You have NO FREAKING clue how much I love you.

...

YOU ARE AMAZING.

Me likely mysteries. Here... for that... HAVE A GIF.

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(I hoped that worked.)
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#10 suze.angelova

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 02:18 AM

This sounds like it's gonna be AWESOME!!!

Write more soon, pleaseeeeeeeee?!?! :D



Love, Suze :heartbeat:

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#11 Jcrazy

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 11:04 AM

London: Thank you, lovely first person to comment :P I hope you continue to love it. 

Alex: Aw, thanks, Alex. That first line the summary is kind of important to me, because summer's means way too much to me in a way :). First chapter right after this! 

Mel: Thanks! I hope you like it. And happy birthday! Hope it's a good one. Consider the update my birthday present to you. :P And I'm supposed to inform you today is also...Memo day and national waitress/waiter day. Haha. 

Olivia: Thanks, dude! :) Glad you're interested. And would you believe I made that banner on an App on my phone? Lol. 

Cheyenne: ... :o You did not get a refill on your medication, did you? ... ; Thank you, daaahling. I would write you a long reply, but that would seem a little biased, right? ;)

Hannah: Yup, I strike again :P haha. I shall update...like right now. :)

Ash (freaky forum stalker): Thanks, haha. Love you too. It's not too much of a mystery... I mean, there is this one mysterious aspect to it, but then again Chase doesn't really KNOW... oh, well, you'll see :P And that picture is sweet. 

Suze: Thaaanks, Suze! I hope it'll be good. :) Update right here! 

:spinstar:

READ THIS: So, I've decided to do something a little different and fun (I think :P). Every chapter is named after a song title, and I have a little section of the lyrics to that song posted below the title (look at the first chapter below as an example). 

If you can guess FIRST who the artist/band is that sings the song, you GET something. Probably a picture/banner with your name on it or something. Or I have a few other ideas :) I just thought that might be something fun and different to do. 

And, beware, I sometimes have weird taste in music. I mean, really weird. :D

And, CHEYENNE, dude. Please don't guess. We all know you know my music better than I do probably :P

OKAY! Enough rambling. Here's chapter one. It came out shorter than expected, but don't worry. This here will probably be the shortest chapter in the whole story. ENJOY! 

:spinstar:

Chapter One
Summertime
"And it's two bare feet on the dashboard. Young love in an old Ford. Cheap shades and a tattoo. And a Yoo-hoo bottle on the floorboard."


There was this really weird, really exhilarating feeling to the first day of summer. That thank-God-that-the-school-year-is-over feel, accompanied by a well-what-the-hell-am-I'm-going-to-do-now feeling. It was such a nice way to wake up that I wasn't going to let anything ruin in. 

Well, that's what I told myself. 

Then Allison walked into my room. And she can wipe a morning smile off someones face like it's nobody's business. 

"Oh my God," she was saying in that panicked voice she overuses, pacing the distance of my room, a hand pressed against her stomach. A pillow immediately went over my face, trying to do the impossible task of shutting my older sister out. 

"What?" I moaned, my irritated and tired voice muffled by the pillow, but still still evident. 

"I'm pregnant," she said. 

I lowered the pillow a little, just enough so I could see her. The look I gave her pretty much read seriously?

"So? You've known that for—what? Seven months? Get over it, Allie." 

Don't get me wrong; I knew telling her that wasn't smart. Oh, I sure knew it. But finals had been screwing with my head for weeks. Maybe I was still coming off that or something. And, really, it was ten in the morning. I didn't start to function humanly until noon, at earliest. 

She glared at me, her green eyes going sinister. I cowered back under the covers of my bed. Older sisters were scary in the late stages of a pregnancy, let me tell you. 

"I know," she said, a bitter edge to her voice. "I just mean...well, it just sort of hit me, Chase."

It "just sort of hit her" about every other week. She would have a minor freak out, talking about how the world was going to end all because she was having a baby. Mom, Dad, or I would deal with it in the only way that seemed reasonable: Nod and pretend she was making sense.  

"I see," I acknowledged, giving the typical serious look. 

"It's just," she said, and I felt her sinking down on the bottom of my bed. Great. "I didn't ask for this." She sniffed. "I mean—"

Then, the most beautiful sound came from my nightstand. The lovely ringing of my cell phone. Not ever had I been more appreciate of that annoying rap song Tripp and Natty had set for my ringtone as a joke. 

"Oh, the phone," I said quickly, trying to hide my happiness as I threw my arms up, jerked the covers away, and attacked my phone. 

"Hey," I said, after I took notice of the caller ID. I felt Allison giving me another look. And not a pleasant one. Then again, Allison had never been a very pleasant person. "What's up?"

"Pingpong," Tripp's voice said. "In twenty minutes. At the pool. Be there."

The line went dead, but Allison's fixated deadly gaze convinced me that what I did next really was necessary. 

"No way," I said dramatically, still speaking into the phone. "Oh, God. That's awful. Is she okay?"

Allison's face changed from frightening (well, frightening to my safety, at least) to concerned. 

"Don't worry," I went on, talking to the imaginary person on the other line, taking long enough pauses for this to all be convincing. "I'll be there soon... Okay. Bye."

I dropped my phone down and hopped up off the bed, keeping up with my magnificent acting skills. 

"What's going on?" Allison asked, standing up too. Although, much slower than I did. Because, let's face it, she was fat now. Speed hadn't exactly been her strong point the last few months, and wouldn't be in the upcoming ones. 

"Oh!" I said, conjuring up something in my head. "The basketball!"

Wait—what?

"Huh?" she asked, tilting her head in confusion. 

Well...

"Well, apparently Natty has possibly contracted a concussion," I began to ramble. It's a good thing I was an expert at that. Rambling, I mean. "She and Tripp were playing basketball and Natty was running towards the basket. You know, she's not very coordinated. And, well, as Tripp threw her the ball, she apparently tried to catch it with her face."

Yes. That was believable. Especially for Natty. 

"You got all that from a one minute conversation?" Allison asked doubtfully. 

I nodded, grabbing clothes out of my closet quickly, trying to make it seem like I was in a serious hurry. 

"Oh. Okay. Well, go see if she's okay," she said uncertainly, watching me dubiously. 

I kept nodding as I started to pull off my pajamas, giving her a very good reason to exit the room. 

"Geez. Wait until I leave the room, Chase," she muttered, putting a hand over her eyes and blindly walking to the door. 

I grinned contently with myself as the door shut. Obviously I should never rule out a career as an actor. 

Either way, after throwing on a pair of swim trunks and a T-shirt, grabbing my keys and phone, I bounded down the stairs two at a time. 

Sneaking past everyone so I wouldn't have to retell the great basketball concussion story again, I jogged down the front porch steps and threw myself into the truck. 

Just minutes later, I pulled into the public swimming pool and grabbed the pingpong paddle from the glove compartment, where it always stayed in the summers when the pool opened. 

This was how summers went. The pool had always been a bit of an oasis for all the kids in middle and high school. I worked at the coffee shop down the road somedays, and the days I didn't work I'd spend goofing off with Tripp at the pingpong table set up under a tented area. We'd challenge just about anyone willing to play us (and then beat them). Natty was a lifeguard, meaning we spent the rest of our time harassing her. 

That's just how it was. 

I walked in and noticed Tripp leaning against the lifeguard stand Natty was perched on. She was rolling her eyes while he talked on and on to her. This wasn't unusual for them. Tripp nodded his wet head, motioning for me to come over, when he saw me. 

"Hey," he said, grinning. "I've found some contenders, I think."

"Oh, yeah?" I asked. 

"Two girls," Natty informed me, rolling her eyes down at us. 

"Oh. So we have to go easy on them?" I frowned, looking at Tripp. 

He shrugged. We had an agreement to not beat girls as bad as we really could. The few times we had, those certain girls hadn't exactly ever been the politest to us ever again. Seeing as not letting someone score a single point could make anyone pissed off pretty easily. 

"That's so sexist," Natty told us. 

Natty was one of those women's rights, tree hugging, vegan girls. And she was totally willing to speak her mind. With her opinions, it made for a lethal combination. 

Tripp was the exact opposite. His favorite joke was women's rights. 

...Get it? 

Which really made it a shocker that they were brother and sister, with their polar personalities and all. 

"Yeah, yeah," Tripp said, brushing his sister off. "Anyways, let's go, Chase." He gave me a shove, pushing me off in the direction of the pingpong table. 

The only problem with the pingpong table was that it was on the absolute most uneven piece of ground ever paved. Also, during the day, the sun had a habit of shining straight in your face if you didn't get the right side. We dealt with it though, and had pretty much spent every summer since sixth grade perfecting our mad skills. 

We walked up around the corner of the concession stand, where the table was at, and that's when I first saw her.

Well, actually, I saw her sister. But, I mean, she was right next to her, and I did at least notice  her presence. 

Yeah. That was the moment, though I didn't know it then, that my life got crazy as hell. 

:spinstar:

So? :) Tell me what you think. CC is not only okay, but encouraged! Haha. And don't forget about the song thing if you know it (or want to be a cheater and Google it)!

:) Jamie
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#12 Cool Dork

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 01:03 PM

HEY! Your long lost friend is back! Sorry I haven't chatted you up in a while! lol This is really good! I like the concept of it!

CLARA
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#13 kylie

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 01:49 PM

Ohhh, Jamie I love this already. I now have a reason to come on the boards! I barely find time lately :(
But I will now! Summer is soon and reading this makes me all the more excited!
Love the title. It reminds me of the song by Plain White T's. Hey There Delilah. So cute.

More soon please! <3 :)
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#14 Jcrazy

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 01:57 PM

Clara: FRIEND! Where art thou been?! Haha. Nice to see you around. :) Glad you're liking it.

Kylie: Thaaanks, dude. I know! Haven't seen you much lately. So glad summer's coming—hopefully everyone 'll be on more. Yay you like it. :) And there's the song I got the name from, haha. And also one of the chapter titles... ;)
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#15 24moon100

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 06:02 PM

Hey Jamie this is really good! I love how easy and flowing your writing is, it has a kind of personality to it. :D So much more easy to read than mine probably. :P I have a confusing way with words. But your way is defiantly readable and looks effortless. I'm truly jealous, in a good way.

Love the banner! Cool catch phrase! The summery was very good. Enough to tell you what to expect but now enough to give the whole thing away. :D

Your style has such a good sense of humor. Its like the right amount of sarcasm and joking combined with everything in between. Its very funny to listen to the internal thoughts of your teenage guy characters because they always make me feel like its actually coming from a guy. You know?

I love your character development. Chase seems laid back. I like how you described his sister, it had me cracking up the whole time! Its funny how you made his two friends brother and sister when they are so different from each other. :P I wonder if he is going to play her at ping pong and how its going to go from there. Love your writing jamie! Glad to see that I can now comment on a story of yours that I can follow with you as you update!

Please post the next chapter soon!

Ps. I like how you are making the titles song titles! Thats very creative of you!

-MEGHAN
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#16 Ohliveeah

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 06:28 PM

I have come to the conclusion that it is always a good day if you update.
I loved this chapter.
I'd offer CC, but I didn't really notice anything since I was so absorbed in the story. (And you said this was a slowish chapter. It's wildly entertaining) Anyway, that's a really good thing because anything I think is wrong with something usually yanks me out of the story and makes it a gajillion times less wonderful.
Anyhow, you rock out loud for writing in a very fantastical manner. May I have a chat with Tripp? He is a bit of a butthead.
Update ASAP please? :):):)
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#17 Gee{or}jah

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 08:01 PM

JAMIE!!!!!!!!!!! (hehehe)

To quote one of the most annoying tv adds on air here at the moment:

"I think I love this, but what am I so afraid of, I am afraid of what I am sure of, a love there is no cure for."

It is stuck in my head.

But, DUDE. This is FABULOUS..... "I want fabulous, That is my simple request, All things fabulous, Bigger and better and best" Bahahaha. ( I just watched HMS2)


I think you write from the mind of a guy really well, and I CANNOT wait for the next bit. Especially because I assume Delilah comes in :D.


"You know you love me. X O X O"
Geeeooogggiiiaaa.


PS. Yes I am sleep deprived. Yes this makes me mentally unstable.
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#18 NikkiandEm

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 09:59 PM

Jamie(ie).....oh darling Jamie(ie).

I do enjoy having you as a friend...because not only are you nice and funny, but you're a FREAKING AMAZING AUTHOR! Yes, i can see this on the bookshelves already. I feel like I'm reading an already-published EBook and I comment on my IPad :D. I can see the author comments piling up, having nothing but great things to say about this. I can see the NYTimes writing about it, and how it's booming off the shelves and is totally full of awesomeness that most authors cannot find.

Yes, i can see it all because of this! The banner is amazing, it would totally draw me to the book....because as much as we hate to admit it, we judge books by covers (I mean who wants to go around being seen with an ugly book!?).


I'm disappointed in myself for not commenting sooner....man I'm late on this. But I hope my comment has made up for it...'cause I speak nothing but the truth, my love :D



-Nikki
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#19 IlovePavlov13

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Posted 21 May 2011 - 11:43 PM

I read this today, but me no post anything.

Aw well.

Anywaaaaaaaaay.

THAT IS THE BESTEST EXCUSE EVER.

Catching a ball with your face.

IT WORKS...

Sometimes.

Unless you count the big red spot on your face as a fail.

Anywaaaaaaaaaaaay, me have another .gif 'cause Captalia had a big .gif spam...

Posted Image

Me gusta Jamie's update.
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#20 papercut

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 12:22 AM

This is AWESOME!!!

i feel sick at the moment

so sitting here after watching my big fat greek wedding

being sick YAY!!

mel :)

p.s. please note sarcasm on the yay
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#21 DayDreamer95

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 07:53 AM

JAMIE! OMGOSH! I loves!! I just love CHASE! I CALL DIBS!!!! Love it!!!



Oh, and the song is sung by Kenny Chesney! BOOOMMM!


Haha,

ANYWAYS!!!


UPDATE!!!!


U
UP
UPD
UPDA
UPDAT
UPDATE
UPDAT
UPDA
UPD
UP
U

N
NO
NOW
NO
N




GOT IT?!??!?


Goood!

(Goes in a manic state because NO UPDATE!)

(Hair is now in mouth..note: Strawberry shampoo tastes gross!)



And for all of you who don't know Kenny Chesney let's play some!




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BWSn0JFRiPI





SUMMERTIME!


Posted Image







Alex~

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#22 bubba97

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 09:17 AM

Jamie, you are amzing :D


This is such an amazing idea and you writing is flawless!

I love this soo much, and I like Chase a lot!


Can't wait for the rest :)


Update soon
-Alexandra
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#23 Jcrazy

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 10:01 AM

OH MY GOD! You guys have no idea how happy all these comments are making me :) Thank you guys SO much. 

Meghan: I always thought my writing sounded kind of different than peoples :P (not sure if that's good or bad), so I guess that's personality. YOURS is most definitely NOT confusing! It's lovely, dear, haha. 
I like the banner too :D hehe. The catch phrase will make even MORE sense when the "mission" begins in the story. 
I have to have something sort of funny in my writing or else it drives me crazy, haha. And, yeah, I always think that even if it's a girl author, it's somehow a guy saying it all. 
Chase IS laid back, lol. And you'll get a little bit of Chase and HER in every chapter, but the first big conversation won't come until chapter four, I think. 
THANK YOU!!

Olivia: AW! Thanks, man. I'm glad to hear there weren't any major mistakes at least. I'd die if there were, hehe. And I don't really like Tripp either! Which is weird, because I never intended to make him a character to dislike. But I do. Haha. 

GEORGIA!!: Aww, you're sweet. :) And it's no where near as fabulous as that song though! Lol. I hope I do a guy okay. I'm afraid he'll sound gay! But he's straight if there's ever any doubt :D And, Delilah will be in the next two chapters a bit, then come in seriously in chapter four, I think. Thanks, Georgia. 

Nikki: You are the sweetest! Lol. Thank you so much, girl. I'm glad you like the banner. And who WOULD want to carry around an ugly book?! Haha. And you commented the day I posted the first chapter! I say you're not behind at all. ;) thanks again. 

Ash: I have caught multiple balls with my face. It works... Wait. Does that sound wrong? Hmm... I'm frightened by that picture. Truly. AND THANK YOU! :D

Mel: Thank you!! :) Aww, you're sick? Hope you feel better, dude. Eat popsicles. It HELPS! 

Alex: You know, I was thinking, and if anyone calls Chase, it's kind of like calling ME. And that's disturbing, isn't it? Lol. 
CONGRATS! I was wondering if anyone would guess! And because I know about your little obsession... :)

Posted Image

Alexandra: Aw, thanks, girl! I'm glad you like it and Chase. :D I'll try and update soon. 

*

I shall update in the next couple days. I'll try to update about twice a week until school is out (June sixth :) last day) and then you can expect them a lot more frequently. I want to have this story finished by the end of the summer, but that's just an estimate. I'm so glad with all the readers I've got so far. :) I hope I can keep you all hahaha.

:) Jamie
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#24 Jcrazy

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 10:14 AM

Oh, by the way, has anyone gotten the irony to the title? CHASING Delilah. And his name's CHASE...lol.

Yeah. Maybe I find that way too awesome. :D

And Cheyenne came up with his last name. Walker? Chase...Walker...lol.

I'm retarded. Over and out! :icon_flower:
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#25 <3Cheese<3

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 10:28 AM

*insert the most amazing, spectacular, superb comment...here*

So, as I am typing this comment, I am laying in a tub of hot water, almost dying from pain in my neck (and throat). 

I absolutely love this chapter because of what Chase does. It was really funny and a great way to start off...who am I kidding? I am NOT that sick. 

THIS WAS AN AMAZING CHAPTER AND I UNCONDITIONALLY LOVE CHASE. There. 

Update?

<3 Cheese Gal

Ps. Jamie, I think we're the only ones who got it :) Walker...ah I am TOO good.

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#26 kylie

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 11:26 AM

Oooh,Chase. Chasing. I get it! Heh heh, I like it!
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#27 Dramagirl221

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 05:34 PM

Oooooh !!!!

This is such a good story Jamie! :icon_flower: I mean yikes!

Lol, I have a friend named Chase. She's a girl though.

Hmm... Why do I get the feeling that she's going to kick their butts and ping pong? ^_^

Anyway, update soon!
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#28 DayDreamer95

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 07:30 PM

*Stares at him for like ever....*


*Now snaps back into reality*

I LOVE YOU! YOU'RE A FRIGGING GENIUS!!!!!


*Looks at the picture once again*


Haha, I like Chase..I like you too..just in a friendy friendy thingie?

Make sense?

Good!!!

*Still smiling as a doofus!!!*

Posted Image



And now, drolling time


Posted Image


Now, after I've complete clogged up you're thread!

OVER AND OUT!

Al-

You know who I am!
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#29 24moon100

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 09:17 PM

Okay now I has to tell you something!

And its very important that you know so you will update...

Posted Image


And I also have a gift for you as well!

Here you go! I give this to you because you are amazing and deserve its wonderful powers!! :D


Posted Image

I love this idea and I find it absolutely enthralling :D

Love your biggest fan (No joke I love your writing),

-MEGHAN
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#30 Jcrazy

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 09:59 PM

Cheyenne: You sound as though you're dying. Hope you make it through the night. Thank you. You know your comments mean a whole lot to me and all. 

Kylie: Haha. Good, I'm not totally insane :P

Hannah: Thank yooou! Hey, I know a girl Chase too! Lol. And oh, you think the girls 'll win? Interesting...

Alex: Ohh, Adam Levine puts anyone in a good mood, doesn't he? :D Friendly sounds good; got it lol. And now whenever we look at this page we will have two adorable pictures of the most adorable lead singer everrr. :)

Meg: Hah! Those have to be the most adorable kitty pictures EVER. Especially the second. :) Thanks, (apparent) biggest fan! 

*

I just realized this weeks going to be so busy. :( I'll constantly post teasers though.

Teaser from chapter two:

"Oh, by the way," I said, "if Allie asks, tell her it was a false alarm and you didn't have a concussion."

Natty stared at me. "What?"


Hahaha. :D
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#31 IlovePavlov13

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Posted 22 May 2011 - 11:34 PM

HOLY EFFEN CHEESEITZ.

THAT IS THE BESTEST THING EVAR.
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#32 Jcrazy

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Posted 23 May 2011 - 07:05 PM

Cheez itz are holy, FYI. And yes, those two lines were the best thing to ever grace the web. :P

*

When do y'all want me to update? because I CAN'T DECIDE. lol.
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#33 24moon100

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Posted 23 May 2011 - 07:11 PM

Update Thursday because thats when I can read it! :D

Oh and I love the teaser! I can totally picture her face when she says "What?" haha!

I hope to see your update Thursday (Maybe)! :D I'm very crunched for time to read so thats when I'd have the most time to just sit back and chill.

-MEGHAN
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#34 24moon100

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Posted 23 May 2011 - 07:13 PM

Oh and you know whats interesting? I'm more of a dog person.

But the internet had so many kitty pics so I thought those two were perfect for this occasion.

:P

-MEG
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#35 <3Cheese<3

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Posted 23 May 2011 - 09:20 PM

Cheese-it's are JESUS!! just, saaaayin'!

:D I could sooo update for y'all right now! It's in my mail *smiles evilly*


*Gets smacked by Jamie*

Nevermind. :P

Meg- Jamie loooooves kitties. She got me a bouquet of them <3

*turtle* Cheyenne
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#36 suze.angelova

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Posted 24 May 2011 - 06:32 AM

*SQUEAL*

JAMIE!!!! I absolutely LOVED that chapter! You are such an incredible writer- you amaze me more and more every time I read your work! :D

Seriously though, I love Chase, and I think you are doing a pretty excellent job of describing the characters and the plot. But don't ask for CC from me as all I think about when I read this story is how awesome it is ;)

UPDATE missy! :)



:heartbeat: Suze

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#37 Jcrazy

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Posted 24 May 2011 - 03:43 PM

Meg: ME TOO! When she says "what?" is her expression kind of, like, blank? That'd how I see it. :P lol.
And I think I am going to update Thursday actually. :)
And I do like cats. And dogs. But cats are like me—they sleep a lot and everyone thinks they're adorable. ;) Kidding.

Cheyenne: Do it and die, darling.

Suze: You guys are too nice. :P Thanks so much though. I'm trying to describe the characters without really actually describing them, lol. Basically I mean describe them through actions rather than words. Thanks again! :D
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#38 Jcrazy

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Posted 25 May 2011 - 11:06 PM

I'm in such a good mood. :D Wanna know why? ...SCOTTY WON IDOL! Hahaha. I love him. And he kissed Lauren. And, ah, if you don't watch American Idol you have no earthly idea what I'm talking about. :) That's okay though. Because I have an update.

Remember, if you can guess FIRST the band/artist that sings the titled song of the chapter, you get something. This is a really easy one. :P

Anyway, enjoy my friends.

:spinstar:

Chapter Two
Hey There Delilah
"Delilah, I can promise you that by the time we get through the world will never ever be the same. And you're to blame."



Her name was Macy. She was seventeen. She and her family had moved here two weeks ago. And she sucked at pingpong.

Regardless of her abnormally horrible coordination, she was still hot

Her younger sister, whose name I'd learned but had currently forgotten, was way better at the game than she was, but that didn't matter. Because, as previously mentioned, she was hot. 

Tripp and I seemed to have the same idea about her, which after the game, when we all started talking, got more and more annoying. At least since glares kept passing between us when we were standing in the pool. 

Macy's sister, who had gone to lay out on a lounge chair with an iPod and a slushie from the concession stand, looked amused, smiling every time Macy said something pointless. Apparently she understood that Tripp and I were being overly friendly to her sister. Macy, on the other hand, was just talking. And talking...and talking. 

And, well, she was a bit annoying. But hot. It balanced out, really. 

"So where'd you move from?" Tripp asked, smiling. He'd been smiling quite a bit.

"Virginia," she said, smiling back. 

Again with the smiling.

"My aunt lives in Virginia," I volunteered. 

She looked at me, nodded, and then turned and asked Tripp something. That's when I pretty much gave up.  

Tripp grinned victoriously at me when Macy wasn't looking. I rolled my eyes. So he'd won. So what?

True confession: Tripp and I fought over girls like it was going out of style. It happened near every time we visited a public place that females inhabited. It was never serious, really. It was just a fun, entertaining thing to do. 

So, this wasn't a giant loss. Especially considering the intelligence level of the girl we were speaking to. Either way, not winning didn't exactly put a smile on my face. 

Don't worry—I know I sound like an idiot. 

"I'm gonna go grab something to drink," I told them, pushing my palms against the burning hot concrete on the side of the pool and lifting myself out of the chilly water, leaving them. They didn't really acknowledge my leaving, other than the small nod Tripp gave with a grin on his face. 

"She looks like a keeper," Natty said, nodding at Macy when I went to lean on the lifeguard stand she'd been observing us from. 

"She's a little dumb," I admitted, squinting at the sun when I glanced up at Natty. Her copper colored hair was tied up messily on top of her head and she was peering down at me over her Aviators. 

"No way?" she said, sounding fake amazed. 

"Come on..." I sighed, looking back towards the pool where Macy was and thinking of a way to defend her. "She's..."

"Wearing a bathing suit three sizes too small," Natty finished for me, smirking. She laughed a little. "You come on. You can do better than that. Anyone can, Chase."

"What about Tripp?"

"Tripp's unique," she explained over the sounds of splashing kids in the water. 

"Meaning that?"

"Meaning that he actually can't do better."

I laughed. Natty was only funny when Tripp wasn't around. They didn't function the same when you had them together. "Hey, do you have any money on you?" I asked, smiling pitifully up at her. 

"Nah, but Jake's working the stand, so whatever it is you want, tell him it's for me and you'll get it free," she said.  

I raised an eyebrow and looked at her. 

"He owes me," she said. "For life."

"Ah." I rolled my eyes and turned around to walk towards the concession stand. 

After I got a lemonade slushy, I went and sat down a few lounge chairs away from Macy's sister, since she had a good view of Tripp and Macy. And, well, if Tripp had won I was at least going to give him a deathly glare the whole time he was speaking to her.

I was obnoxiously slurping down the rest of my drink when Natty came and plopped down on the chair next to me. 

"Okay. I'm on my lunch break and you look lonely. Wanna talk?" she asked, dropping her bag down on the concrete between us and pulling a bottle of spray sunscreen out. 

"Nah," I said, flopping onto my side. "What time is it?"

"Almost two," she answered, pulling a water out of her bag as well. "Why? You gotta work today?"

I nodded, closing my eyes and blindly swatting her hand away when I felt her spraying me with the sunscreen. I never wore sunscreen anyway. I think my skin had some sort of immunity to getting burned. 

"What time?" Natty asked. She really did treat me as though I was five. 

"Like, in half an hour," I mumbled. It's not as though it really mattered though. It was just Coffee.

"Chase," she groaned. "Go home and change. I know you don't think so, but you will get fired one day if you're always late."

I opened my eyes and smiled at her. "Shannon will never fire me."

"So you think." She sighed and rolled her eyes at me again. Natty's signature thing was to roll her eyes. Sometimes they seemed like they were in constant rotation when you really pissed her off. "Anyway. How's Allie?"

I groaned, closing my eyes again. 

"That good?"

"She's a pain in the...well, everywhere actually..." I realized.  

I cracked my eyes open and Natty just shrugged, unsure of what to say. 

Allison had come home four months ago from college and broke the news. Along with the other news that she needed a place to stay. Of course my parents let her move back in with us. Really, you couldn't say no to Allie and Mom and Dad would always help her if she needed it. They weren't too pleased that she had waited so long to tell us though, or the fact she didn't exactly know who the daddy was. 

Either way, I'd kind of reveled in the feeling that Allison was the bad child for once. It's not as though I was the bad one... But she had always been the perfect one in the house. You know, like in high school she had the four-point-oh and graduated with honors and a bunch of other things that don't matter the second you graduate. And I was the, "Hey, well a D isn't so bad!" one. 

Point is, she was just as annoying as she was before she'd left for college. 

"Oh, by the way," I said, "if Allie asks, tell her it was a false alarm and you didn't have a concussion."

Natty stared at me. "What?"

"Long story," I brushed her off, standing up slowly from the lounge chair. "Anyway, I'm gonna go to work."

She grinned. "Have fun." Anyone that knew me knew I had a bittersweet relationship with my job. 

I walked over to the trashcan and passed Macy's sister, smiling slightly at her as I tossed the plastic cup in the trashcan. She acknowledged me with a nod and then shut her eyes. 

Huh, I guess some people don't take losing very well...

I pulled into the small parking lot of Coffee a few minutes later. Instead of going home to change, I just pulled my T-shirt that I'd taken off back on and hoped no one would notice that it was swim trunks and not shorts that I was wearing. 

Now, don't get me wrong, I'm happy to have my job. I mean, it's easy. Serving an assortment of drinks to people (not just coffee—in fact, there's less coffee than any other drink at Coffee) is not something that requires an abundance of talent. But, well, I happen to hate one of my coworkers.  

And I know it's a right of passage or something to hate someone you work with at least once in your life, but I swear that Felix is the only person you can spend five minutes with and easily contract a headache.

Anyway, I walked into Coffee (creatively named by the owner, Shannon) already knowing Felix was there since his pale blue Mustang was sitting outside. I swear, I could feel the migraine coming on the second I walked in the door, hearing the chime that always signaled someones entrance. 

A few people were scattered around the tables at the front near the windows. Felix was vigorously taking someones order (I know. Only Felix can take someones smoothie order vigorously) and nodding seriously. 

I saw Shannon leaning against the counter in the kitchen, watching Felix curiously, with that same God-why-haven't-I-fired-him look she always seems to wear. He's her nephew and I'm pretty sure that's the only reason she's ever been able to come up with. 

"Oh, hey, Chase!" Felix said enthusiastically, handing the man in front of him a smoothie. Smoothies sold a lot better than coffee, especially during the summer. I'd worked at Coffee for since the summer after my freshman year; this was my third summer. I would know. 

"Hey," I said, grabbing my green apron from under the counter and tugging it over my head.

"You been at the pool? Those swim trunks?" he asked, taking a closer look at me bottom half. Which, of course, wasn't the least bit strange...

"Yeah. I stopped by," I answered shortly.

See, I get Felix, unlike a lot of people. He's got probably the worst case of ADHD the world has ever seen. Even though I understand and tolerate him though, that doesn't mean I've enjoyed a moment I've spent with him. Not one. Ever. 

"Did you see Natalie?" he asked. 

And he also had the biggest crush—no, obsession—on Natty.

"Uh, yeah," I answered, nodding and just hoping that he wouldn't go and harass her as soon as he got off his shift. 

Felix nodded again, running a hand through his spiked up hair that was so blonde it was nearly white, appearing to be thinking about something. 

While he was thinking, I went to the back and clocked in, something I rarely remembered to do. When I came back out, Felix was taking someone else's order in the same manner as before. 

"Okay," Shannon said, coming up behind me. "I've got to run over to the store and get something. Do not let him drink any coffee. You know what it does to him."

Sometimes I thought the only reason Shannon kept me around was to be Felix's babysitter. Which, really, was one hundred percent fine by me. Minimum wage was much more than I deserved anyway. 

"Hey, Chase, did you catch that new movie last night about the dudes at that place, you know?" Felix asked me. 

I glanced at him, not bothering to tell him that made no sense. Instead, I just said, "No..."

"Well, oh, man. You missed it! Here, let me explain it to you..."

I sighed to myself, getting ready for a shift of nonstop talking. 

The day passed uneventfully until that evening when it was almost time for me to get off. Even though it wasn't hard, I always found myself watching the clock for the last hour of work. Just like school, actually. 

I saw Laila's car pulling up for the evening shift and breathed a sigh of relief. Felix was standing next to me, talking eccentrically about Call of Duty. I swear, it's his fault I've grown to hate the game. 

Before Leila could walk in though, another customer did. I gladly stepped up to the register, ready to talk to any other human being. 

"Hey, hey. What can I get you?" I asked casually when she stepped up to the register, looking up at the signs above my head that listed all the drink choices. It wasn't until she propped her sunglasses on top of her head that I recognized her. 

"Oh, hey. Chase, right?" she—Macy's sister—said. I suddenly felt bad about forgetting her name. 

I nodded. She'd changed. Clothes, that is. She had on a pair of cutoff jean shorts and a white and black Beatles T-shirt. Her dark hair (the complete opposite of her sisters) was piled messily on top of her head. I also felt bad for not having noticed her at all, I realized, when I met her.

"Yeah," I confirmed, swallowing hard for some reason. "Pingpong." I smiled. I could feel Felix—always curious—watching us. 

She didn't really smile back, just nodded and said, "Anyway. Can I get a strawberry smoothie?"

I opened my mouth, but of course Felix beat me to it. 

"Coming right up," he said grinning, slapping the counter once, and walking towards the back. 

Suck up...

"It's gonna be three dollars and fifty-seven cents," I said to fill the silence while he was getting her drink. 

She nodded, digging into her back short pocket and pulling out a five. She flattened it out before handing it to me. I got her change slowly, so I wouldn't have to say anything until Felix got back. 

"Here's your smoothie," Felix said, coming up behind me just as I dropped the last nickel into her outstretched hand. 

"Thank you," she said politely, sliding the change back in her shorts before glancing at me and saying, "Well, later."

"Yeah, later," I agreed. It was funny she didn't just say bye, but I just smiled at her. 

She was a few steps away when I stopped her, saying, "Hey," knowing I'd regret it for some reason if I didn't ask. 

She pivoted and turned her head back, gray eyes immediately capturing mine. 

"Yeah?" she asked. 

"What's your name again?"

A mixture of amusement and annoyance crossed her face that I couldn't help but cringe at. Then she just smiled a little. 

"It's Delilah."

Delilah.

:hyper:

...Does anyone imagine that last italicized Delilah as like an echo in his mind? I DO! haha.

So, tell me what you think. Give me CC. Say whatever the heck ya want, for all I want it feedback. Please and thank you all. :D

America's *MAYBE* new favorite couple:

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So what? I'm obsessed with two people from a reality show! Don't judge. :D
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#39 24moon100

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Posted 25 May 2011 - 11:23 PM

Okay so there is a comment after this but I just want to say who the band is before everyone else!

PLAIN WHITE TEES!!! (I hope I spelled that right) And be proud of me because I didn't look it up. :D

-MEGHAN
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#40 24moon100

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Posted 25 May 2011 - 11:45 PM

Oh wait....Maybe I got them mixed up with the beetles....Memory lapse!!!

I'm just guessing even though I should know this!

-MEGHAN
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#41 24moon100

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Posted 25 May 2011 - 11:48 PM

Well okay...I confess I looked it up to see....I was right the first time! :P

Comment in a minuet once I'm finished reading!

-MEGHAN
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#42 Jcrazy

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Posted 25 May 2011 - 11:49 PM

Meg: Darling, it's the PWT's haha. You got it the first time. :P Prize coming tomorrow.

Looking it up is legal, haha. Google is my best friend anyway.

Edited by Jcrazy, 25 May 2011 - 11:50 PM.

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#43 24moon100

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Posted 26 May 2011 - 12:17 AM

Okay so it took me a while to read because I'm like the slowest reader ever but here are my thoughts...

you should be scared. :D

First of all I cannot stress enough of how brilliant your dialogue is. :) That last part felt exactly like an eco in the back of his mind to me even before you pointed it out. So excellent job.

I'd have to say I'm surprised to find that he was more interested in his sister than in her at first so I have to give you credit because I did not see that coming. Usually I predict things when it comes to stories :D.

I loved how you didn't even discribe the pingong game and just buzzed over that. No offense but I wouldn't have liked to read about a ping pong game :P I'm glad you talked about how Macy was the hotter one but her sister had the skills. Its good you haven't made his mysterious girl just another stunner. Its kinda interesting to find that she has the cold shoulder. I wonder when the trip begins. :D

Just a bit of CC....I HAVE NONE! Okay well just make sure you use more diverse sentence starters. Not just the same I-word. Even though you don't do it that often, I just noticed it popped up a lot. But then again what do I know? I suck at CC but I'd just thought I would mention it because you asked for something and that was the only thing I could think of. I hope I'm not stupid for saying that. :P Honestly I din't find it that bad because I produce a lot more mistakes than you do. :D

I laughed when you introduced felix! Haha. I didn't have a migraine! I bet it was just chase, he didn't seem THAT bad. :P

Natty's cool, I like the friendship between them. It was so normal and hilarious to read the conversations they had.

So I hope you can understand my rambling enough to know what I'm talking about. I'm a sucky commenter but I did read and I didn't get board once! So thats impressive you can engage me into your story. People probably read the first line of my crap and decide that its not worth it. :P

Anyway....A quote I just decided was utterly terrific!

"She's a pain in the...well, everywhere actually..." I realized.


HAHAHA!!!! I laughed so freaking hard!!! I really do appreciate that. It just made my night. :P

Great work Jamie! You never fail to blow me away. Keep updates coming!

Ps. Lauren and Scotty are meant for each other! <3

-MEGHAN

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#44 suze.angelova

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Posted 26 May 2011 - 07:45 AM

oh my god..........oh my god............oh my god...............oh my god!!! :o

How is it even possible to be as good as you at writing?

Do you know how amazing this is?

I literally feel like I am reading a pro novel by some best-selling author, and I cant even blink while I go through the chapter because it's that good! :)

Update ASAP missy, because both you and this story are amazing! :D



Much love,
Suze <3

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#45 bubba97

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Posted 26 May 2011 - 08:17 AM

I. Love. Chase.

He's such a guy!


Jamie, you have such an amazing talent :D


You're soo good you have no idea how much I enjoyed reading that chapter!


I could just feel the chemistry between Chase and Delilah!



And Natty and Tripp are very interesting characters!

What's Tripp's full name?

Cause Tripp's a nickname, right?



Anyway loved it Jamie,

Post the next chapter, please :)

-Alexandra
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